Sometimes ..

Sometimes I wish it wouldn't have happened at all.

Sometimes I wish there had been nothing to jump for.

Sometimes I wish there had been no first call,

that you and I never got attracted, that we'd never fall.

It's not like I enjoy hurting you.

But I just did what I think I had to.

I'm stuck between not caring & feeling horribly guilty.

I don't know ..

XoXo,

Ni.

Stay.

Would you stay if I ask you to?

Would you care if I tell you I love you?

Don't leave me hanging in here.

Don't leave me at all.

I need you close to me, need you near ..

Miss the train. Pull me close.

Hug me tight. Kiss my nose.

This is like a continuation to my previous poem 'Goodbye'.

XoXo,

Ni.

P.S : My main blog 'Tales of and by her' completes one year on the 1st of July. Drop by sometime :]

Do It My Way.

I am not going to give up, because I still want to try.
I'm not going to wipe my face, and fake a laugh when I still want to cry.
I am not going to say yes,I understand, when I simply don't.
I am not going to tell you I will do it, when I know I wont.

I am not going to say I got it, when I still want to know.

I am not going to lie, and say that I don't cry.
I'm not going to say I don't care, and be unfair.
I'm not going to scream and then ask you to keep it low.
And I'm never going to say that I'm over someone, when I can't let them go...

XoXo,

Ni.

She Must Be Something!

Get over him.. Let him go.. 

You'll heal, but slow. First, you have got to let him go.
Don't call her a bitch. She must be something,

Coz she's the one he wants to be with!

XoXo,

Ni.

I Give Up.

I've come such a long way.. And I'm giving it all up today.

They said that I wasted time crying on him.
They may be right, they may be wrong.
All I know is I'm no longer that strong,
To take heartbreak over & over again, Coz I'm already going insane.

I don't know why I suddenly feel this way,
But I just am giving it all up today.

I can't keep daydreaming all the time,
Thinking of one day when I'll call you mine.
Because I already have so many things to worry about,
Such a mess, I want to shout!

I don't know why I'm suddenly feeling this way,
But I am giving it all up today.
I'm just putting all thoughts of you and us, away.

In the start, I dreamt a lot about you.
And I kept wishing all that would come true.
But now that I know it wont,
I'm giving it all up today.

XoXo,

Ni.

Trust

I'm sick and tired of you.
Of not knowing what you say is fabricated or true.
You have broken my trust, over and over and over again.
To you, does this all seem just some game?

I loved you with all my heart, blushed each time you looked at me,
Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine this outcome.
I never thought you'd leave me.

Vacation seemed a lot of fun, but all these mind games piss me off.
Feel like crawling and crying in the dark.
You've hurt me over and over and over again.
To you, does this all seem just some game?

So hard the pain stung me,
I almost refused to believe the truth,
Believed me and you were still 'us', still 'we'.

How could you turn so mean?
What happened to us? To you?
But now you're enjoying with her, while I sit here moping like a fool.

Can't say I'm truly over you, 

Coz I still dream of us, 

I still think there is some good left hidden in you.
But they all tell me, that behind those sardonic grins and masked eyes,
You're still rolling the dice!

XoXo,

Ni.

I'm Losing You!

I'M LOSING YOU!

 

Every single time you behave this way,
You leave me with nothing to say.
Now the good memories have been reduced to just a few,
I feel like I'm losing you .. And I don't want to!

I love you and I know you do, too.
Then what' got you acting the way you are?
It's like yesterday you were with me, now you've gone away someplace far.
I feel like I'm losing you .. And I don't want to!

The misunderstandings, they keep piling up.
I say something, you misinterpret and take it to your heart,
Suddenly we have begun to drift apart.
I feel like I'm losing you .. And I don't want to!

Do you not love me anymore? Are you starting to hate me and all that I do?
You've got me so confused, Just tell me what is going on!

I'm searching for answers, but you won't reply,
Tell me the truth. Was this whole thing a lie?
Coz I believe you, when you say you love me, I know it's true.
So why are you acting this way?
You leave me with nothing to say.
I'm losing you .. And I don't want to!

XoXo,

Ni.

Infatuation ??

INFATUATION

I'm sitting by the sill,
I'm trying to get this one sum right,
I'm trying so hard but still ..

Your mesmerizing eyes, your smile,
You've got me so distracted, I almost dropped my file!

I am trying to study, but you've made it so impossible for me to concentrate.

Takes me double the time to do work, coz I'm thinking of you, staying up till late.

Boy, is this just infatuation?
I love you so much. Do you need a demonstration?
Do I have your confirmation?

Maybe you're right, but I think you're wrong.
Just so you know, you're the one who keeps me going.
The one who is helping me stay strong.

Boy, is this just infatuation?
I love you so much. Do you need a demonstration?
Do I have your confirmation?

XoXo,

Ni.